An abused or neglected child is a child who is harmed, or threatened with physical or mental harm, by the acts or lack of action of a person responsible for the child's care. There are several forms of abuse: physical abuse, emotional abuse, and sexual abuse. Child neglect is a form of abuse that occurs when a person responsible for the care of a child is able, but fails, to provide necessary food, clothing, shelter, or care. Each state has its own definitions and laws concerning child abuse and child neglect.
Child abuse and neglect are serious problems for our society. The number of cases reported has increased each year since 1976, when statistics were first kept. Brief discussions of each form of abuse are presented below.
A child is neglected if the persons this child depends on do not provide food, clothing, shelter, medical care, education, and supervision. When these basic needs are deliberately withheld, not because the parents or caregivers are poor, it is considered neglect. Often parents or caregivers of neglected children are so overwhelmed by their own needs that they cannot recognize the needs of their children.
Physical abuse is the deliberate injury of a child by a person responsible for the child's care. Physical abuse often stems from unreasonable punishment, or by punishment that is too harsh for the child. Sometimes it is the result of a caregiver's reaction to stress. Drinking and drug abuse by caretakers have become more common contributing factors in physical abuse cases.
Physical abuse injuries can include bruises, broken bones, burns, and abrasions. Children experience minor injuries as a normal part of childhood, usually in predictable places such as the shins, knees, and elbows. When the injuries are in soft-tissue areas on the abdomen or back, or don't seem to be typical childhood injuries, physical abuse becomes a possibility.
Physical abuse happens to children of all age groups; however, youth ages 12 to 17 have the highest rate of injury from physical abuse. This is possibly due to increasing conflict between parents and children as children become more independent.
Emotional abuse is harder to recognize, but is just as harmful to the child as other forms of abuse. Emotional abuse damages the child's self-esteem and, in extreme cases, can lead to developmental problems and speech disorders. A child suffers from emotional abuse when constantly ridiculed, rejected, blamed, or compared unfavorably with brothers or sisters or other children.
Expecting too much from the child in academics, athletics, or other areas is a common cause of emotional abuse by parents or other adults. When a child can't meet these expectations, the child feels that he or she is never quite good enough.
When an adult or an older child uses his or her authority over a child to involve the child in sexual activity, it is sexual abuse, and that person is a child molester. The molester might use tricks, bribes, threats, or force to persuade the child to join in sexual activity. Sexual abuse includes any activity performed for the sexual satisfaction of the molester, including acts ranging from exposing his or her sex organs (exhibitionism), observing another's sex organs or sexual activity (voyeurism), to fondling and rape.
Here are a few facts you should know about child sexual abuse:
Preteen and teenage boys are especially at risk for sexual abuse. The physical and hormonal changes caused by puberty, and their natural curiosity about their new emotions and feelings, make these youth likely targets for child molesters. The normal desire of boys this age to show their independence from their parents' control adds to the risk. This combination might keep boys this age from asking their parents for help when faced with sexual abuse.
Approximately one-third of sexual molestation occurs at the hands of other children. If your child tells you about club initiations in which sexual activity is included, or if your child tells you about inappropriate or tricked, pressured, or forced sexual activity by other children, this is a form of sexual abuse and you need to take steps to stop the activity. This kind of sexual misconduct is serious and should not be ignored.
Children who molest other children need professional help. They are much more likely to respond to treatment when young than are adults who were molesters as children and received no treatment, and continue to molest children as adults.
Parents and other adults who work with children need to distinguish between sexual behavior that is a normal part of growing up, and sexual behavior that is abusive. If you find your child has engaged in sexual behavior that might not be abusive, but which bothers you, use the opportunity to discuss the behavior and help your child understand why it bothers you.
The best sign that a child has been sexually abused is his statement that he was. Children often do not report their abuse, so parents should be alert for other signs. These are some signs to watch for:
The following are common signs that children are upset. If present for more than a few days, these signs could indicate that something is wrong and your child needs help and parental support. They might also be signs that your child is being sexually abused:
Except for sexual abuse of boys, the great majority of child abuse occurs within families. Prevention efforts for emotional and physical abuse as well as neglect generally focus on helping abusers, often the parents, change their behavior.
Some physical and emotional abuses are reactions by parents to the stresses in their lives. By learning to recognize these stresses, and then taking a time-out when the pressures mount, we can avoid abusing those we love. The next section lists some alternatives to physical and emotional abuse for overstressed parents. These suggestions come from the National Committee to Prevent Child Abuse.
In addition to the alternatives on the next page, parents and other child caregivers may want to think about the following questions* suggested by Douglas Besharov, the first director of the U.S. National Center on Child Abuse and Neglect, regarding the methods of discipline they use.
These questions help to define the boundaries between acceptable discipline and child abuse. Other causes of child abuse inside the family might be much more complex and require professional help to resolve.
The next time everyday pressures build up to the point where you feel like lashing out—;Stop! Try any of these simple alternatives. You'll feel better ... and so will your child:
Few parents mean to abuse their children. When parents take time out to get control of themselves before they grab hold of their children, everybody wins.
Some parents would almost rather have a tooth pulled than talk with their children about sexual abuse. This reluctance seems to increase with the age of the child. To help you in this regard, the information in Section II focuses on sexual abuse prevention.
The following information should help you and your child talk about sexual abuse prevention:
Today's teenagers and preteens receive a lot of misinformation about sexuality, relationships, and sexual abuse. Their role models are likely to be rock stars and other media personalities. As influential as these are, surveys of young people indicate that parents continue to be a strong influence in their lives.
If your child becomes a victim of abuse, your first reaction can be very important in helping him through the ordeal. The following guidelines may help you:
You should show real concern, but NOT alarm or anger, when questioning your child about possible sexual abuse.
Finally, if your child has been sexually abused, do not blame yourself or your child. People who victimize children are not easy to identify. They come from all walks of life and all socioeconomic levels. Often they have a position of status—they go to church, hold regular jobs, and are active in the community. Child molesters are sometimes very skilled at controlling children, often by giving excessive attention, gifts, and money.
Child molesters use their skills on parents and other adults, disguising their abusive behavior behind friendship and care for the child.
A Time to Tell is a videotape produced by the BSA to educate boys 11 to 14 years of age about sexual abuse. This video introduces the "three Rs" of Youth Protection. Boy Scout troops are encouraged to view the video once each year. It is available from your BSA local council. A meeting guide supporting its use can be found in the Scoutmaster Handbook (beginning with the 1995 edition).
For Scouting's leaders and parents, the BSA has a videotaped training program, Youth Protection Guidelines: Training for Volunteer Leaders and Parents. This also is available from your BSA local council, and regular training sessions are scheduled in most districts. It addresses many questions that Scout volunteers and parents ask regarding child sexual abuse.
In addition to these videotaped materials, the BSA sometimes provides Youth Protection information to its members and families through Boys' Life and Scouting magazines.
National Center for Child Abuse and Neglect
U.S. Department of Health and Human Services
P.O. Box 1182
Washington, DC 20013
800-394-3366
National Committee to Prevent Child Abuse
332 South Michigan Avenue, Suite 1600
Chicago, IL 60604-4537
312-663-3520
National Center for Missing and Exploited Children
2101 Wilson Boulevard, Suite 550
Arlington, VA 22201
800-843-5678
* Adpated from Doughlas J. Besharov Recognizing Child Abuse: A Guide for the Concerned. New York: Free Press, 1990.
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